if you forget me

*One of my fave poems : If you forget me By Pablo Neruda


If You Forget Me

I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.

Pablo Neruda

cerebro destosido

my brain is tired and weak and my body feels like it is unbalanced.
within these weeks of my so called vacation I am seeking to clean up my life!
My room is a pigs pen....
biggie pad homework assignments everywhere...
bags of fabric that i just brought....
my textbooks everywhere..
clothes and bags...
UGhhhh.....welcome to the room of a college student....

yeah.......gonna works my ass of too.............................
It is tiring dealing with people at work.I have learned to be very very patient.Yup.....
I shall get use to it since I am gonna be working my whole life right?

I am kinda getting use to my life at the moment just work and college.There are times I wanna shoot myself,but i rather have it this way more than anything else.
It is worth it though i know it is and thats what keeps me going!

chubawaba

finally I am on my big break since I started school in like the summer...
non-stop work,school and going out
It feels as If next year has to be the year where I have to get my shit together.It just does and means I kinda have to keep it on a limit.
Dang I am almost gonna be 19 and I feel obligated to be an adult with these responsibilities and what not.I wanna be a kido!
Gag........................
I can't screw up with the only person I have backing me up.I can't do that anymore because shes done so much.
Then another thing I did not expect to ever see a particular person again.I don't mind ,but i just rather not just because.I dunno the reason....really I don't.
My buddy is leaving........off to achieve her goals which is the best thing to do for her.I give her props for taking such a big leap.

I wish I could leave the OC.This barrio is lame.Rather live in a rural place where everything lovely and peaceful.
Have two place in mind of where I wanna go after grad,but it all depends what doors open for me.

as of now I am just trying to get this all out of my system because I know that if I keep on this side of the tracks I am gonna loose everything.I don;t want thats I came this far to do that and it is not worht it.
I am still down for a good time though once in while perhaps.

sick up the spazz

well yes I am sick again for like the fiftieth bazillion time.I think all this quarter in school,sleepless night and procrastination have pretty much taken it's toll on me on finals week!$#!$@#% bad really bad!
I am trying to sneeze but somehow my brain is teasing me.
I felt so embarrassed I threw up at work.....no one saw but only this one guy.IT was kinda funny since he was like "orale" hahah when i was puking in one of the trash cans.
I hate being sick.It's not a pretty sight when I am either.
LOL my eyes sink,my under eyes get puffy,my face is pale and I feel so out of it.
Yeah I hope this winter break will clear my head and what not.
I need to get my head straight.

I am going to miss my closest friend,Victoria HERnandez.
Hopefully I'll go visit her in Missurri during spring break.I am gonna miss the coffee dates,getting my hair did by her,going to show(our wreckin memories),shmokin thee pankake hahahaha,long drives to pick up friends and just chilling at amy's pad.


I don't know how next year is going to be like,but hope all goes well.
dang i am going to turn 19 in two months!
Ay I am getting old yet I do not feel that age.

gibergabers

I think I have a problem..........haha with shopping
I think I deserve it in some way I basically make a fool of myself wearing a ridiculous uniform for work,saying yes to every command even if I dread it,it's my job and dealing with assholes once in a while.

YEah I have been naughty spending money on things...guilty as charged lol
well one thing,but it will be an exciting project to start in the spring 0f 09(crossing fingers!)
I can't say NO to going out with my buddies,my familia and other shenanigans.
As far as I know I have to stay away from ebay!

Money comes and goes thats for sure.
It will probably be an issue my whole life but hopefully I can make it next year.
It's gonna be a fucking trip.......
but worth the experience of finally being on my own.