So I messed up again and I practically have no one.Last night was not bad at all.I had fun being somewhere I have never been too and with people I did not know.IF I had to go through it again I would have brought body spray or breath mints.I am so desperate to prove to my parents that I can do it alone in this world.I can,but it's the money thats a problem.And well my party ways,I don't even consider myself a avid party goer or a drunk.I am so misunderstood at home that I don't even want to be here right now.Wish I could runaway,but sadly I have no car and no money to go anywhere.
My mother had basically not talking care of me anymore and my father well fuck him.I guess I am taking care of myself now.Things are going to be rocky at the beginning of 2010,but I think I can make it.Just going to work for myself and the independence I crave.